1.7.12

It's Not That I've Forgotten

It's not that I've forgotten my promise to take care of you. It's just that we are not possible cos we are so different.

In that year I'd tried loving you in Jesus' name, but when I realized how much hurt it had caused us, I'm sorry that I've just got to let you go and I did.

I'd let you go so many months back, keeping my distance from you, but you stuck on. You sensed something amiss and knew what was happening, yet you tenaciously clinged on, hoping I would change my mind. I couldn't. How I dreaded to see you, hear you, that even an sms from you would sent me into sleepless nights. I gave you time to adjust and to accept this fact, that the damage in our relationship is irreversible and I just couldn't bring myself near you again.

I'm sorry, I really have not forgotten my promise to take care of you, but I just can't do it anymore. Perhaps one day Jesus will heal the wounds in you and I, but for now, I just wish you the best in your future as you return to your homeland.

As I continue my daily chores, there is a faint lingering ache somewhere inside which I want to ignore. I know things will be better with time, for you and for me. I'm sorry I couldn't keep my promise, but it wouldn't do us any good even if I'd force myself to continue with you, there'll be more hurts and pains. But I remain your friend, and your sister-in-Christ, and I truly wish that you will live happily, grow and mature in the Lord. May the Lord bless you my young friend, do not give up on your faith in Christ, I've failed you, but God did not.

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