Period of Rest

"This seems to be a situation where your season in this place has come to an end... there is a change of seasons when plants and trees prepare for winter by shedding their leaves in the fall. It is as if they go into a prolonged period of rest, undisturbed by the harshness of winter". These precious words of advice came from MTJ, my fellow blogger cum brother-in-Christ.

Yes, my season in my present self-chosen place of market-place ministry has come to an end. This is not the end of me serving God, but a siesta, a much needed break, like a tree preparing for change by first going into a period of rest, the best part is "undisturbed by the harshness of winter".

I've a certain winter melancholy attached to entering this season of rest, having to let go of my charges halfway. It seems halfway to me because they are still so immature in Christ, and yet I've to let go because I've finally come to realize that my time in their lives is almost up.

Looking back, I know that I've done my best, but with hindsight, wouldn't do some of the things I'd done. Yet, there is no such a thing as time travel, no benefit of hindsight, which means even if God has allowed me to return to the past to start all over again, I being me, would have made exactly the same mistakes because I wouldn't recognize them as such. But the greatest comfort I have here is that my God is so powerful and creative that He can and will make ALL things work together for good! In this, I rest my soul.

Through it all, I've learnt that it is necessary for ALL believers to come out of their comfort zones to serve God. We have to go into the battlefield. Christ has loved us to death, and we have to love Him enough to leave our comfort zones. We've read the Bible, God's Word talks of taking up the cross, denying yourself, being a living sacrifice and so on. I've to admit that such 'talks' are a turn-off, especially to new believers. We gravitate towards the love, joy and peace parts. But at some points in our lives, believers will come to a place where you'll crave for a higher purpose, a sense of significance, about making your life counts, for God and for His kingdom.

For me, it wasn't about the crowns, jewels or mansions that attract me, but the gratitude to God when one day He suddenly spoke, "I've allowed you to do what you want with yourself all along, now how about doing something for Me for the rest of your life?" That's true, I've had my fair share of dreams-chasing, money-chasing etc. the offer from God was attractive, to do something of significance, something that'll last eternally... thus my entry into market-place ministry, with the focus NOT on earning an income, BUT on introducing lost souls to Christ.

Something became obvious right from the beginning of my ministry, that it is going to COST! It'll cost my time, effort, money, labour and the sacrifices extend to being misunderstood and persecutions sometimes from the very ones you've learnt to love and serve. It was a bitter-sweet experience, watching people you've laboured over turn to Christ, and being disappointed with them over their growth. Then I learnt that I was impatient, again MTJ said, "Jesus reminds us in the parable of the tares that there is no need to pull them up before the harvesting occurs. That is our tendency; removing what we believe is unnecessary" which was MY PROBLEM, being too impatient with their spiritual growth, adding unnecessary pressures on them, and causing conflicts.

My conclusion from this episode is this, that though spiritual warfares abound, the show must go on, the ministry must continue. For my ministry with these two young persons, I've prayed to God that, "Jeremiah's time is up Lord, please send Elisha". For me, maybe He won't fetch me home in a fiery chariot yet (I'm so tired and burnt-out that I really don't mind though), but I shall rest, wait and watch, the labourers are few, and God will soon enlist me into service again.

Let me end yet with another advice from MTJ, "John the Baptist said of Jesus, "He must increase, I must decrease." We must learn to trust God with others, He will do what we cannot and should not".

Being human, which God allows :) :) , I am grieving over leaving my charges because they have become so dear to me... and to leave them now, the pain is almost unbearable... The pain is borne out of the knowledge that they are not my own children whom I'll always have, and can always watch over. They are instead, people whose destiny I'll have no control, and if they should be tossed to and fro in their own worlds of choice and circumstances after they return home (they are foreigners), they would be beyond me to help and guide..................... I know this is where faith plays its part, that I can do nothing but entrusts them to their faithful Creator.

Still Kicking

Hi all, just to say I'm alive and kicking in 2010. :) I thank God for His goodness towards my household in 2009.

And hey, a piece of good news to those who are concerned, the person I was witnessing to, she accepted Christ on 24 Dec 09 and I'd caught her joy on video! Praise God! Finally, I've 'achieved' something of lasting, eternal value, not that I could save her but that I was let into this privilege of reaching out to her for Christ. Praise God!

I love her.

How Much Longer?

Waiting ... I've labored hard these days for two important things; my job and someone's salvation. Both are slow in bearing fruits. My patience has been stretched and tested, sometimes to the breaking point. My faith wavers. "Was it really You Lord who have called me into this???"

Then, each time I doubted, encouraging thoughts would come in, like, "What is seen is transient, what is unseen is eternal", "All things work together for good, with those who love Him, who are called according to His purpose." "It is more blessed to give than to receive." And simply, "Hang on."

I know in there somewhere, in my mind, heart or intestines, that it is not time to leave the two goals that have sustained my enthusiasm these past 6 months. Nothing has been accomplished yet! At least, nothing that can be seen has been accomplished yet. Yet, something inside says that I can't go yet.

Doubts came when I counted my costs, in terms of time, money and effort. Goodness, I'd toiled for the past 6 months, and earned nothing in the balance! You know, taking away the expenses etc. from my income, I'm left with nothing, may be even a negative number!

I'd told myself a few months' back that hey, some missionaries are working with no financial support and over here, I've an opportunity to earn an income while I witness for the Lord, I'm better off! ... Yes, I acknowledge, I'm indeed better off than many worthy children of God who risk life and limbs for our Saviour, and here I'm whining...

But, I can't help it. I'm only human God and I'm so tired. I've worked my butts off literally, I used to have a round butt, now it's flat! Perhaps You can spend a little less time on my hair, and start counting my sales? Please?

Ah, I'm not dictating what God can do in my life... God is not my God if He can't have His ways in my life, and His ways are always good, and yields far-fetching results beyond our wildest dreams. I'm just tired, and I shall just eat, drink and sleep, and eat, drink and sleep again till I gain enough strength to run the next 40 days and 40 nights like Jeremiah did!

Winning Souls

No one is ever won over to Christ because he/she looses an argument with us, Christians.

May God reduce me to love, over and over again.

Love makes one vulnerable, to the hurts, pain and loneliness of others. Love hurts and can be painful, but look to God for healing and comfort... His grace is sufficient for you.

Salvation - Accepting Christ

Here's a testimony on God's grace and salvation ...

I believe that God exists, that He is my Creator and that He loves me. I believe that He knew me when I was secretly wrought in my mother's womb. I believe that He knows my future and is keen on minding my welfare and guiding me through life. Therefore I turned to Him and accepted Christ as my Lord and Saviour.

And I believe that He loves you and has a wonderful plan for your life too if you would turn to Him. I believe that He longs for you to know Him so that He can help you, no matter how stained your life has been before.

My Saviour has proven Himself to be a faithful God to me. He has led me through many difficult situations in my life and has been very patient with my shortcomings and failures.

I was born into a dysfunctional family and was immediately fostered out to two different families within my first year of infancy. The last family I stayed with was yet another troubled family. I grew up with many a tear-stained pillow. It was God's grace that'd preserved my sanity during those growing up years. And it was God's love that'd restrained me from many a foolish act of rebellion.

I am truly thankful to God and without any intention to offend you, I would like to bless you by inviting you to receive Christ too.

New American Standard Bible:
John 3:16 "For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life."
John 10:10 "The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I (Jesus) came that they may have life, and have it abundantly.

Jesus Christ is the same, yesterday, today and forever. He has died on the cross for your sins and you are forgiven if you'll receive Him as your Saviour. If you have the desire to live a more fulfilling life and to taste the goodness of God, may I encourage you to invite Christ into your life by saying a simple salvation prayer now?

God knows your heart and is not concerned with how you phrase your prayer. Just pray like you're talking to someone. As long as you confess with your lips and believe in your heart that God has raised Him from the dead, you will be able to receive Jesus as your personal Lord and Saviour.

The following is a suggested prayer (that I'd modified from the Four Spiritual Laws booklet):

"Dear Lord Jesus,

I need You. Thank You for dying on the cross for my sins.I open the door of my life to You and receive You as my personal Saviour and Lord. Thank You for forgiving my sins and giving me eternal life. From now on, please take control of the throne of my life and make me the kind of person You want me to be. Thank You for your salvation. In Jesus' name I pray. Amen."

If you have said this prayer meaningfully, you have become a child of God! Praise God!

The next thing to do is to get in touch with a local Church and let them know that you are a new Christian, and in need of further guidance to know God better.

Thank you for taking this step of faith. May the Lord bless you and keep you.